Powerful wind

Today as I drove home, the weather was incredibly powerful. I was driving and felt invisible forces tugging my car left and right. They were so powerful that cars in front of me were slowing down and pulling to the side of the road. As an engineer, I can’t help but imagine the kind of energy that is contained within these winds. If you could create an imaginary sphere around these forces and determine the amount of energy that enters vs. the amount that exits I believe it would be incredible to view.

That sense of awe at the energy contained in the wind is similar to what I feel as the power of time. Just two days ago I experienced what has been my best day as a father. Maya and I spent a full 5 minutes (though it seemed like an eternity) staring into each other’s eyes where she seemed like a fully aware human being.
More Maya

She was staring as intently at me as any other fully grown person would do when I was talking to them. She has these moments from time to time, but what made this special was that she started to smile at me. The smile started in her left, my right, corner of her mouth. She kind of half smiled, then with a tremendous effort the smile spread to the right side of her mouth. It was amazing. I was in awe. I’m sure my friend Chris and Sarita and my parents who were at the dinner table with me as I held her didn’t notice, but it was so powerful. She smiled and the world stopped. But to bring it back to my wind analogy, the power of time is quickly diminishing what that smile felt like. Today I came home between a long day in the office and a business dinner to kiss Maya and Sarita and I couldn’t remember the feeling of that smile. I could remember that it happened, but the feeling of peace and confidence was just a memory – no longer real but just some words I could recall to describe that experience.

I went to lunch with my friend Mike on Tuesday and he mentioned to me the power that time had and the ability of time to wipe away the real feelings. I’m hoping he’s wrong, but planning that he’s right. I’m therefore going to try to record, from the moment, what it feels like as Maya’s dad. She’s amazing. She’s life changing. I want to remember it all without having the process of recording it all to interfere with experiencing the moment. Is that too much to ask? Maybe I should tell it to the wind.

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